how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
