OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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