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Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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