Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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