Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
