i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I intend to get homeless drunk
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
