I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
