All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
