Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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