I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
