That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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