I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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