dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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