love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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