ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Sober January is a disaster.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
