Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
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