weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
