Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
