That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
