how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
MIDGETS
????
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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