The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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