Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Just pee around me
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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