I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
