Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
