I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
