after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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