What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
