Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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