do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
