just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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