somebody snuck up and got me drunk
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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