bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize