It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
