dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
