woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
