Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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