Can Purell be used as lube?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
