yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
