ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
