idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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