I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
