just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize