how can u be prego again
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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