take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Randomize
