So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
