You just made me feel so damn special
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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