Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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