Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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