Don't you send me to vm
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize