have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
